insecurity
i went to a trip
this was a very happy trip
but i was not happy
simply because
i found insecurity
he said i was an angel face
he had this crush on me
i also thought he was kind of cute
maybe we were meant to be
but then i saw this guy
who was tall and handsome too
my friend liked him as a toy
but i wanted him as a friend
this guy liked my friend
he really does...
but my friend only sees him
as an innocent boy waiting to be touched
he will get touched
and played and fooled
i don*t want it to be
please let him free
but he wants to be
touched toyed and fooled
poor handsome guy
left at the same place where he stood
but this other guy
who seems to befriend me
said i was the one
who he wants to be with
but i dont know
and i dont care
all i want is
that image that they share
they all see me
as some best friend material girl
who no one could love
more than a friend or so
no one could say they love me
because im not that kind of girl
i always smile at all faces
and make them happy as they were
i make there frown upside down
i could listen to them saying all they want
but they can never see beyond that line
they know fate could not intertwine
but im thankful at least
one friend believes in me
time will just passs by
some one will come to make me smile
i want this friend to be happy
cause he knows the real me
he was there when no one came
he was there, simply untamed
but he tamed me, i tamed him
we are both in the same situation
where we are lifeless within
he has found what he wants, i haven't
i thank god for an answered prayer
cause he came at the exact time
to be my friend the one who will always be there
giving me smile, hope and laughter to share...
puso ko'y nasasaktan
"puso huwag kang sumuko. hindi pa huli ang lahat. maaari pa maging kayo - maaaring maging tayo- sa atin dalawa ayokong bumitaw. hawakan mo ako ng mahigpit. sa ating dalawa wag mo akong piliting mawala. huwag. ayokong pang sumuko. turuan mo na lumaban ako. huwag kang sumuko puso"
lagi na lang akong
nasasaktan
sapagkat
hindi ko alam kung
talaga bang para kami
sa isa't isa
o ang lahat ay guniguni lamang.
marami na ring
pagkakataong nasisira
ang samahan
- ang magandang samahan -
sapagkat lagi na lang
nag-aalinglangan.
wala naman karapatan
para pagdudahan
ngunit hindi mapigilan
magdalawang isip
tumingin sa
iba't ibang mukha
ng senaryo.
hindi ko rin maipalagpas
ang aking pagmumuni muni
na sana ako na ang babaeng perpekto
para sa kanya - para sa iyo -
alam ko na mahal niya ako - mahal mo ko -
sapagkat
totoo ako sa sarili ko
ngunit tila unti-unting
nababahiran ang aking
tiwala sa sarili
ng mga salita
mga boses
nagsasabing
hindi nararapat
ang aming pag-ibig.
hindi ko rin malaman
kung talagang pag-ibig na
itong nadarama.
siguro ay tama sya..
pag-aaral muna
ngunit nawawalan ng saysay
ang bawat pagsikat ng araw
tuwing hindi ko sya naiisip.
tila hindi ko mapansin ang kagandahan
kapag hindi sya nakitang ngumiti..
bakit ba nagdadalamhati ang langit
kapag ninanais.
hindi ba makuntento
ang langit na binababoy
ng isang katauhan ang
perpektong likha ng panginoon.
siguro nagdadalamhati
ang langit sa lupa
sapagkat hindi nito
nadadanas ang
masaktan at ang masiyahan.
kahit unti-unting nasisira
ang lupa ay tanggap niya
ang mga pagkakamali ng mga nilalang
- tanggap niya ang kanyang kahinaan.
bakit ba ikaw ang langit?
bakit mo ba ako minamahal?
huwag ka ng lumuha sa aking harapan
sapagkat binibigyan mo ako ng pag-asa.
- pag-asang pumapatay sa akin -
ang pag-asang
nagsasabi na tayo pa rin
kahit ang ating mga labi ay hindi na maipagdidikit.
kahit ang ating mga mata ay hindi na tatanaw.
kahit ang ating mga kamay ay hindi na magtatagpo.
kahit ang ating mga sarili ay malapit na.. masira.
kahit hindi na mag-iisa ang ating mga diwa
- at ating pag-ibig -
nasasakal ako
hindi ko maisip na ikaw ang magiging kabiyak ko
hindi
hindi talaga tayo
tama na..
wag ka ng umiyak
lagi tayong magsasama
ngunit kahit kailangan
hindi mag-iisa
ang langit at lupa
escalator.tip
as i was on the escalator
i look around
see this sea
this sea of people
who are passing by
walking around
do they really know where they should go
i dont
i dont know
i feel like walking to this abyss which is the crowd
i want to run away
all i want to do right know is what i like
--
the passion --
i went to the hospital a lot of times right now
this cage was sucking me
like a
vampire was present only worse
it was an invisible corpse passing by
we ended up locked in that
--cage--for like over night
i woke up around something something in the morning
only to find that it is
ice-coldreally
ice coldwhen i stood up
it was normal again in temperature
something is haunting meit is invisible
is it essential to me?
is it essential to feel this weakness that covers me?
we went outside of that cage for sometime
and went to an even bigger cage
or what i call a market
it was the mall
you see the different images
that mirror the soul of this earth
i cant seem to understand
putting on this mask
trying to accept this trend
this so called wave
trying to impress others
when we cant even find contentment inside
why do we need to walk this road
and find that we dont belong
or at least we think we belong
this feeling keeps on moving me
when i feel closed or suffocated
i stand and walk
i walk
walking has given me this sense of security
it is kind of odd to think that walking
could really burn a lot of calories
all i have to do right now
is burn some weigh
burn some energy
burn my desire
i need to find that spark
that flame
i will light it up again
to see the things that i use to have
to be on the go
i dont want to be a sloth anymore
this weakness is killing me
i have to fight myself
some how
yellow was my color
but when added with
redit ends up with who i am
-- orangelike
intellect when added with passion
gives happiness
i need those materials
i hope you could just buy them in a store
ill save all the money ill have
to just buy that passion
i need it
badly
ill go down this escalator
and wait for you to come
and pass me by
